by Sean Shannon

Welcome to the wonderful world of joshi puroresu, folks, aka the babes. As always, http://www.prowrestlingtapes.com/ is where you should go for your puroresu requirements.

Just to go over the obvious for some of you, I admit I am somewhat of a novice when it comes to puroresu, but I'm learning. If you wish to assist with this learning process I would be most appreciative, but if you're going to be condescending or rude about it then don't bother.

- Recorded in Tokyo 1999.05.04.

- Your hosts are no one. Do your own commentary, it's fun!

- Just a word of warning for those of you new to Arsion as I was when I watched this tape: all the referees like to channel the spirit of Earl Hebner after the two-count. In other words, the first two counts are normal speed, but there's a LONG delay on the third count, and the delay isn't always the same length. So don't expect the same decimal-counts I did with the All Japan recap.

- All the participants in the tournament come to the ring for the usual pre-tourney ceremony. Remember, folks, despite what the evangelists will tell you, not everything puroresu is about the wrestling.

- Quarterfinal match: Hiromi Yagi vs. Rie Tamada. And, of course, Arsion really messes with my mind by putting on tag team partners in nearly identical outfits against each other in my first match. Thankfully Tamada has much longer hair, otherwise you wouldn't be getting much help from me on who was who. Circle, dodge, it's all good. Collar-and-elbow, Tamada pushes Yagi off. Circle, collar-and-elbow, Yagi gets an armbar and takes Tamada over with it in a backdrop suplex-type motion. Yagi picks Tamada up and whips her to the corner but Tamada climbs up onto the second rope and goes for a missile dropkick, so Yagi just swats her away. Yagi tries a dandita into a bodyscissors but Tamada escapes and tries to drop a leg on Yagi but Yagi rolls out of the way. Yagi off the ropes tries a jumping high kick but Tamada swats her away, then gives her a forearm to the back of the head. Yagi reverses a cross-corner whip but Tamada leapfrogs her charge, then swats away Yagi's attempt at a boot to the gut and locks on a back waistlock. Yagi elbows out, but Tamada locks it right back on. Tamada tries a German suplex but Yagi reverses that into a rollup for a short two as Tamada reverses the rollup into one of her own for a short two. Both women up (you don't know how used I am to typing "both men up"), Yagi charges at Tamada but Tamada kicks her in the gut, then hits a DDT for barely a two. Tamada picks Yagi up and drops her with a vertical suplex for a short two as Yagi bridges out. Yagi off the ropes, Tamada ducks her clothesline then attempts a backdrop suplex but Yagi shifts her weight and falls on top of Tamada for a short two as Tamada bridges out. Tamada bounces off the ropes and floors Yagi with a nice clothesline for a short two. Tamada picks up Yagi up, knees her in the face and then hooks on a front facelock and goes to the corner to try a tornado DDT. Yagi puts on the brakes, though, not letting Yagi climb the ropes, so Tamada just drops her with a regular DDT. Tamada picks Yagi up and drops her with another DDT, then perches her on the turnbuckle. Tamada tries to climb up to meet her but Yagi pushes her off, then hits a missile dropkick off the top for a short two. Yagi picks Tamada up by the hair, cinches in a back waistlock and hits a bridging German suplex, rolling herself up to sit on Tamada's legs, for a short two as Tamada pushes her off. Yagi off the ropes, locks on a scissored ankle lock but Tamada reaches the ropes. Yagi picks Tamada up but Tamada drops her with a forearm followed by a discus punch. Tamada covers for a long two. Tamada picks Yagi up and tries to lock on a full nelson, but Yagi slips behind her and cinches in a sleeper. Tamada breaks the sleeper with a jawbreaker, making sure to hold on to the arm Yagi had around her throat. Tamada then takes her up by that arm, dodges an attempted punch by Yagi with her other arm, then grabs THAT arm for a La Majistral cradle for a short two. Before Tamada can get back to her feet, though, Yagi locks the scissored ankle lock back on. Tamada makes the ropes but not after a long while, and she comes up favouring that leg. Both women up, Yagi tries to dropkick Tamada's bad leg out from under her but Tamada sidesteps. Tamada floors Yagi with a discus punch, then picks Yagi back up and locks that full nelson in. Yagi breaks it, but Tamada immediately gets a back waistlock and bridging German suplex for a long two. Five minutes gone. Tamada with a low cradle suplex with bridge for a medium two. Tamada to the top, hits a missile dropkick for a long two. Tamada picks Yagi up and locks in the full nelson, but Yagi gets to the ropes. Tamada gives her a forearm to the back of her head for her troubles. Tamada tries an Irish whip but Yagi tries to reverse that into a short-arm clothesline, so Tamada ducks the clothesline, goes behind, gets the full nelson back on and hits a bridging Dragon suplex for a super-long with cheese two. Tamada turns Yagi over onto her back, then goes to the top and hits a double stomp to Yagi's gut, but makes the mistake of standing over Yagi one second too long as Yagi grabs her bad leg, trips her up with it and puts the scissored ankle lock back on. Tamada fights for the ropes an awfully long time and finally makes them. Both women take their time getting to their feet as Yagi tries to go to the top but Tamada limps over and slaps her in the face, then climbs up to the top to try a vertical suplex but Yagi jumps over her, takes her over with a top-rope schoolboy, then locks the scissored ankle lock back on - the other leg. Oops. Tamada fights for the ropes but she's in the middle of the ring, and has to tap out at 8'08". Nothing too notable but fun nevertheless. **1/2

- Quarterfinal match: Yumi Fukawa vs. Mariko Yoshida. Thank you to Yumi for having the decency to put your name on the front of your outfit, making it easier to keep track of things in this match. Well, that and it gives me an excuse to look at your front as well. Pre-match handshake goes by with nothing but sincerity. Nice delicate opening as both women try to get position until finally we got a collar-and-elbow. Yoshida releases into an amateur double-leg takedown and rides Fukawa down, getting a one-count. Yoshida continues riding Fukawa, not letting her twist out of it by countering into a waistlock. Yoshida then turns that into a front face lock, then spins that around into a double wristlock, getting a one-count. Fukawa locks on a bodyscissors but Yoshida stops that with an overscissors. Yoshida grabs Fukawa's ankle but Fukawa gets to her feet, twists around and tries to roll Yoshida over into a jujigatame but Yoshida gets her hands together, turns Fukawa over onto her hands and knees, scissors one of Fukawa's arms with her legs and adds a waistlock to boot. Fukawa fights for a rope break and gets one. Yoshida picks Fukawa up and Fukawa goes for another rolling jujigatame takedown, but can't get Yoshida over as Yoshida holds her hands together, and manages to get a two-count on Fukawa before Fukawa finally kicks her arm away and gets the jujigatame, but with Yoshida on her stomach so she can't get the full effect of the cross-armbreaker. Yoshida rolls around, finally succumbing to the full brunt of the hold, until she gets back on her stomach and Fukawa just gives up, releases the hold and kicks Yoshida to the outside. Fukawa gives chase by going out to the apron and stomping the arm she was just working on, then taking Yoshida down on the floor with a wakigatame. The ref comes out to make Fukawa break the hold as Fukawa throws Yoshida back into the ring, then goes back into the ring, bounces off the ropes and dropkicks Yoshida in the bum shoulder. Fukawa with an arm wringer into an over-the-knee armbreaker into a wakigatame, but Yoshida rolls over and gets her feet on the ropes. Fukawa picks Yoshida up but Yoshida reverses an Irish whip into a kitchen sink kneelift, which she follows up with two short stiff kicks to Fukawa's head. Fukawa fires back with a couple of forearms, a kick to the stomach and another forearm, but Yoshida stops her flurry with a crisp punch to the head. Yoshida with a snapmare into a sleeper, but Fukawa slips out and locks on a front face lock. Yoshida wriggles free and mounts Fukawa, then spins around and tries to lock on a jujigatame of her own but Fukawa locks her hands together. Fukawa lets her hands go, but only because she's so close to the ropes she just grabs them straightaway. Both women up, Yoshida locks on a combination front facelock and chickenwing, then as Fukawa fights with her free arm Yoshida reverses the arm she uses to chickenwing Fukawa so she can grab Fukawa's free arm and hold it from the front. Hard to describe, but it looks damn effective. To top that off, she takes Fukawa to the mat with it by scissoring her leg and rolling her over, painfully bending Fukawa's head down, then as Fukawa tries to roll around Yoshida adds a bodyscissors. Fukawa finally gets a rope break as the five-minute mark is reached. Yoshida picks Fukawa up and tries to powerbomb her but Fukawa slips out, then ducks a Yoshida clothesline and gets the rolling jujigatame takeover. Yoshida rolls right back onto her stomach, though, and gets the ropes with her foot. Fukawa picks Yoshida up and locks in a front chancery but Yoshida breaks it with a knee to the gut, followed up by two more. Fukawa dropkicks Yoshida's bad shoulder again, though, and goes for a wakigatame but Yoshida wriggles free, mounts Fukawa with a back waistlock then hits a German suplex. Yoshida picks Fukawa up and tries to get her in the spinning body vice Tajiri busts out every once in a while in ECW, but Fukawa doesn't let herself get picked up and gets herself in position to take Yoshida over with a bridging backdrop suplex for a medium two. Fukawa locks on a wakigatame but not on the arm she was working previously, and Yoshida reaches the ropes after a bit of spinning around. Both women up, Fukawa locks on a back waistlock but Yoshida reverses into a sleeper. Fukawa breaks that by dropping to her back. Both women up, Fukawa tries to clothesline Yoshida down but Yoshida grabs her arm, spins her around and tries to powerbomb her, but Yoshida rolls right back down and locks on a scissored achilles' tendon hold. Yoshida fights for a rope break for a long time and finally gets it. Fukawa drags Yoshida back out to the centre of the ring by the foot and locks on a mounted achilles' tendon hold, Yoshida tries to flip out of it but Fukawa just sits down and gets a long two-count. Fukawa picks Yoshida up and tries to take her over with a backdrop suplex but Yoshida grapevines her leg around Fukawa's and then falls forward with her body on the middle rope. So Fukawa, with righteous indignation to burn, stomps at Yoshida's head and shoulder hard five times. Fukawa off the ropes, Yoshida ducks her clothesline and hits a backdrop suplex for an extra-long two. Yoshida picks Fukawa up and locks a cobra clutch in, then goes for extra evil points by lifting Fukawa up and spinning her around with it three times, then taking her to the mat and adding a bodyscissors to the hold. Fukawa goes for the ropes but she's in the middle of the ring. Fukawa manages to get her trapped arm free so Yoshida gets a double evil bonus by wrapping her leg around the back of Fukawa's head while scissoring her near arm. Fukawa fights for the ropes, and this time manages to get to them. Yoshida picks Fukawa up and tries to bodyslam her but again Fukawa counters with the rolling jujigatame takedown on the bad shoulder. Yoshida gets her hands together and tries to push to the ropes but doesn't make it, her hands come loose and she's caught in the dead centre of the ring flopping around like a fish, and yeah, I'd say the crowd is suitably hyped at this point. Twice Yoshida manages to get her hands back together and flop around only to find herself back in dead centre of the ring with her hands apart, each time the crowd popping louder, until finally Yoshida gets the ropes to big applause. Ten minutes gone. Fukawa picks Yoshida up and tries a wakigatame takedown but Yoshida rolls through, gets behind Fukawa and tries another backdrop suplex, but Fukawa hits a rollover into a pin for a LONG two and the crowd is nuts. Fukawa picks Yoshida up and tries the rolling jujigatame takeover again but Yoshida rolls over, mounts Fukawa to release the hold, and takes Fukawa over by scissoring her far arm, then grabbing the wrist of that arm with her own far arm and using her near arm to lock on a choke, bracing it against her far arm for leverage. As you could guess by how complicated that description was, that gets the tap-out at 11'34". This, folks, is what's called WRESTLING. ***3/4

- Quarterfinal match: Michiko Oumaki vs. Mikiko Futagami. Someone find out the name of Futagami's dentist, so when I'm in Japan I know NEVER TO GO THERE. Pre-match handshake goes awry as Futagami pulls Oumaki towards her and locks in a sleeper. Oumaki tries to break it with a jawbreaker but Futagami's teeth are already in such a state that the move does no good and the sleeper remains. Futagami turns it into a side headlock then grapevines Oumaki's leg, rolls her down and works on the ankle. Oumaki breaks it by kicking Futagami with her free leg about three times real, real hard, so Futagami kicks her in the head too. Futagami then lays two stiff kicks into Oumaki's back as she sits on the mat, then slaps her in the back of the head stiff as well. Futagami picks Oumaki up, but Oumaki puts the brakes on an Irish whip attempt, then slaps Futagami right in the face. Oumaki bounces off the ropes, but Futagami catches her charge and hotshots her on the top rope. Futagami rolls to the outside and drapes Oumaki's head over the apron, face down, and lays a stiff forearm into her face. The announcer tells everyone to get the hell back as Futagami takes a few steps back, gets a clap going and hits Oumaki with a somersault kick to the back of her hair. Since that sucked, Futagami lays another stiff forearm into her face, then goes for another running somersault kick and this one damn near takes Oumaki's head off. Back in the ring Futagami picks Oumaki up and braces her against the ropes, then bounces off the opposite side and lays a hard clothesline into Oumaki's chest. Futagami nails another clothesline in the same manner, then takes Oumaki off the ropes and floors her with another clothesline for a long two. Futagami picks Oumaki up and cinches in a full nelson but Oumaki slips out, grabs Futagami's arm and takes her over with it. Futagami gets up and ducks an attempted spin kick by Oumaki, but Oumaki goes right into a jujigatame takedown with no trouble at all. Futagami rolls into it and gets back to her feet with Oumaki releasing the arm scissors, so Futagami grabs at one of Oumaki's legs but Oumaki shoves her to the ropes with the other one. Oumaki gets to her feet but drops her head too soon and Futagami nails her with a somersault kick for a long two. Futagami picks Oumaki up but Oumaki nails a quick arm wringer into a double chickenwing into a tiger suplex with bridge for a slightly extra-large two. Oumaki goes to the top and lies in wait for Futagami to get to her feet, but when Futagami does she catches Oumaki coming off the ropes and locks in an achilles' tendon hold. Oumaki flips around to her back, though, and lays a stiff kick into Futagami's head with her other leg to break the hold. Futagami bounces off the ropes but Oumaki catches her with an arm drag, then grapevines both Futagami's arms behind her back. Futagami counters this by twisting around to get one arm free, then she rolls to her knees and bends one of Oumaki's legs behind her neck with her arms, taking nearly all of Oumaki's body weight in the process. Oumaki flaps for the ropes and manages to get to them, barely. Futagami picks Oumaki up, gives her an Irish whip and catches her coming off with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, but holds the backbreaker a split-second too long as Oumaki gets her knee up hard into Futagami's forehead. Futagami, not liking this, gives Oumaki a hard slap to the face to put her down. Both women to their feet, they slap each other in the face at the same time and both take a step back. Futagami charges at Oumaki but Oumaki ducks her attempted clothesline, grabs her and takes her over with a half-nelson suplex, covering for an extra-large two. Oumaki picks Futagami up and tries to powerbomb her, but Futagami reverses to a back body drop. Oumaki gets right back up and goes for a jumping spinning back kick, but Futagami catches her ankle and locks on a reverse scissored achilles' tendon hold. Oumaki crawls for the ropes but Futagami pushes her back to the centre of the ring. Five minutes gone and Oumaki makes the ropes on a last-second lunge. Futagami picks Oumaki up and tries to pump-handle her but Oumaki nails her with a back elbow. Oumaki bounces off the ropes but Futagami catches her with a palm thrust that has a sickening cracking sound to it, but Futagami only gets a medium two off of it. Futagami picks Oumaki up but Oumaki ducks a spinning backfist, so Futagami just slaps her back down for a long two. Both women to their feet, Futagami goes to a corner and lies in wait then charges at Oumaki, but Oumaki catches her with a slap that takes her down for a long two. Oumaki picks Futagami up but Futagami slaps her in the face, so Oumaki plants about four front wheel kicks upside her head, then bounces off the ropes and hits a stiff jumping spinning back kick. Futagami gets back up but Oumaki slaps her right back down, and that gets the three-count at 6'29". This match was about four degrees of stiff, and you know what? SO WAS I! No, not really, I just had to make that joke, but seriously, good match. ***

- Quarterfinal match: Aja Kong vs. Candy Okutsu. The pre-match interviews give us a unique insight as to why Kong wears all that ugly paint over her face: it's actually an IMPROVEMENT over the way it naturally is. Zowie. As for Candy, all I will say is there is only one in the land of joshi cuter than her, but you'll have to wait until my next Arsion recap to read about her. But tonight Okutsu turns it up a notch as she has an outfit that, if I didn't know better, I'd say she was trying to do a female Diesel character in. Whatever the case, it works for me, that's for sure. Both women circle, a couple of guys yell out "OKUTSU!" and Okutsu acknowledges them, leading to Okutsu starting up a chant in her name and Aja quieting the people going along with the chant just by looking at them. The chant dies down and one guy chants "AJA!" in its place once, and Kong encourages him to keep it up, until finally there's a good-size chant going for Bitch Poochie. It's not wrestling, yes, but it was cute for what it was. Both women circle, collar-and-elbow, and both women work it for all its worth for a good long while, until Okutsu gets her back to the ropes. Ref wants a break but Kong lays in a knife-edge chop to Okutsu's chest (and Tokyo is not Flair Country - no wonder I want to go there). Okutsu no-sells it, though, so Kong lays in another one. Again Okutsu no-sells, so Kong lays in ANOTHER chop, and AGAIN Okutsu no-sells. Babe, that is NOT the way to get ahead in a promotion. Kong finally says "to hell with this" and locks in a side headlock, but Okutsu pushes her off and actually has the nerve to not go to her back when both women meet shoulder-to-shoulder. Okutsu bounces off the ropes and tries a solo shoulder tackle but Kong is JUST TOO FAT. Kong bounces off the ropes to try a shoulder tackle but Okutsu drops down. Kong somehow manages to step over Okutsu and come off the opposite ropes only to be felled by a forearm smash by Okutsu. Okutsu catches Kong as she tries to get to her feet with a stomp to the head, then she picks Kong up only to get a cross-corner whip reversed and taste a Kong avalanche in the corner. Oh honey, I feel for you. Kong picks Okutsu up and hits a release vertical suplex followed up by an elbow drop for a long two. Kong picks Okutsu up again and lays a forearm across her back, make it two, then she whips Okutsu cross-corner but Okutsu scales the ropes up to the top and comes off with a quarter-moonsault for zero. Both women get to their feet and circle and Okutsu actually has the nerve to try a test of strength and pays the price, as Kong just uses her leverage to violently pull Okutsu into her massive frame. Kong stomps Okutsu while she's down, then picks her up and whips her cross-corner, but Okutsu slingshots herself up to the top rope and catches Kong charging in with a missile dropkick. Kong goes down, but promptly gets right back up and no-sells the dropkick. Kong then dodges an Okutsu clothesline, bounces off the ropes and takes Okutsu down by slamming her massive frame into her, but Okutsu gets up in no-sell mode as well. Okutsu ducks a Kong clothesline, then nails a release German suplex, but Kong still won't sell a lick. Kong ducks another Okutsu clothesline, and hits a backdrop suplex. Okutsu isn't getting up so quickly as the five-minute mark is announced, but finally Okutsu gets up and goes back to no-sell mode. Okutsu ducks a Kong clothesline, but Kong just bounces off the other side and tries another clothesline, and this one connects for a medium two. Kong picks Okutsu up and Irish whips her, and both women try to clothesline each other but neither goes down. Kong bounces back off the ropes, but Okutsu floors her with a jumping high kick. Okutsu picks Kong up and locks in a back waistlock but Kong runs forward to the ropes. Okutsu lays a forearm across Kong's back, and tries to Irish whip Kong but Kong goes for a reversal, so Okutsu reverses that into a backslide ... for three? Both women promptly spring right back to their knees and have looks on their faces as if to say, "What the hell just happened?" I know the feeling. Match went 5'57", and after the match Kong gets on the stick and says some stuff that draws some laughs from the crowd. Match wasn't too terrific in terms of wrestling, but it was still fun to watch. *1/2

- Semi-final match: Hiromi Yagi vs. Mariko Yoshida. Oh sure, Yagi changes into an alternate outfit for THIS match. Why couldn't she have used this outfit in the opener and made things a lot easier for me to keep track of? Yagi extends her LEFT hand for the pre-match handshake, and Yoshida foolishly accepts it, forgetting that's the arm Fukawa worked to hell in the last match, as Yagi pulls her in and drops a couple of elbows on the arm. Yagi stomps on the arm, then bounces off the ropes and hits a rolling jujigatame takedown. Yoshida tries turning into it but that does little good, until finally she reaches the ropes for the break. Both women up, Yoshida ducks a clothesline then hits a backdrop suplex for a long two. Yoshida picks Yagi up and tries the same body vice she tried in the last match but Yagi turns it into a sunset flip into a bridge for an extra-long two. Yoshida is up first, though, and she cinches in a combination mounted dragon sleeper and armbar, just pulling Yagi's neck back to all get-out. Yoshida turns it over and adds a bodyscissors to boot, but loses the armbar enabling Yagi to wrench Yoshida's arm off of her neck. The bodyscissors remains, though, so Yoshida locks on a scissored sleeper. Yoshida finally makes a full escape and mounts Yagi from the top, painfully trapping Yoshida's bad arm in the crook of her knee. Yoshida kicks at Yagi to try to release the hold, but nothing doing as Yagi gets to her feet while standing on the arm, then drops her leg on it. Yagi picks Yoshida up and bodyslams her for a one-count but Yoshida goes straight to a headscissors. Yoshida releases the headscissors to go to a scissored ankle lock, but Yagi grabs her bad arm and locks on another jujigatame. Yoshida rolls over to release the pain, then gets to her feet, lifts Yagi up by her head and slams her down to release the hold. Yoshida picks Yagi up but Yagi reverses an Irish whip then hits an armdrag and tries to turn it into a jujigatame, but she's got Yoshida's good arm so Yoshida rolls over and locks on an ankle lock. Yoshida turns it into a scissored ankle lock and Yagi has to crawl to the ropes for release. Yoshida picks Yagi up and whips her cross-corner, Yagi springs up to the second rope but Yoshida ducks her attempted quarter-moonsault. With Yagi down Yoshida stomps her rudely in the head, then tries to do so again but Yagi swats her foot away then grabs a back waistlock, but Yoshida reverses the back waistlock into one of her own and goes right back to the scissored ankle lock. Yoshida then manages to grab Yagi's other leg and turn it into a figure-four on the spot, but Yagi gets the ropes. Yoshida picks Yagi up and tries to plant her with a backdrop suplex but Yagi flips through and hits a German suplex with bridge for two. Five minutes gone. Yagi picks Yoshida up and perches her on the top turnbuckle, then punches her in the face and climbs up as well but Yoshida pushes her off onto the mat. Yagi runs right back up, though, and hits an armdrag off the second rope, then back into the jujigatame. Yoshida turns into it and finally reaches the ropes. Yagi stomps at Yoshida's arm then picks her up but Yoshida reverses an Irish whip and tries to flapjack Yagi, but Yagi turns that into a rolling bodyscissor back into the jujigatame. Yoshida barely makes the ropes so Yagi drops her leg on Yoshida's bad arm again, then picks her up and Irish whips her, but Yoshida hits a dropkick to Yagi's knee. Yoshida picks Yagi up, locks on a cobra clutch and tries to spin her but has to let go after one rotation because her arm goes out on her. Yoshida gets right back up and bars Yagi's bad leg, though, and even scissors the other leg for good measure. Yoshida pulls Yagi back to the centre of the ring and Yagi rolls onto her stomach to try to release the pain, but that doesn't do any good as it effectively turns Yagi's hold into a figure-four from behind. Yagi crawls to the ropes and finally gets them, but the damage is done. Yoshida picks Yagi up but leaves her arm open for a rolling jujigatame takedown, but Yoshida rolls right into it and tries to hook on the same hold she beat Fukawa with in the first round, but can't get it locked on and ends up in a wakigatame. Yoshida goes for the ropes but just barely misses them, teasing the crowd into getting even hotter, until finally she reaches them to pop the crowd. Yagi picks Yoshida up and tries a wakigatame takedown but Yoshida slips out, floats over Yagi, grabs a mounted back waistlock and hits a nice release German suplex. Yoshida picks Yagi up and tries the body vice again but Yagi stops her by punching her bad arm twice. Yagi bounces off the ropes and tries a clothesline but Yoshida swats it away and hits a short powerbomb for a long two. Yoshida clamps on a mounted achilles' tendon hold, and just as Yagi is about to get to the ropes Yoshida pulls her back into the centre of the ring and locks on my favourite submission move of all, the fish stretch sleeper. Yagi manages to wrench her leg free to just leave the headlock remaining, but Yoshida turns that into a jujigatame from behind at the ten-minute mark. Yoshida grabs Yagi's head for more leverage, but Yagi won't give up so Yoshida turns it into a Crippler Crossface, then goes straight from that to the Rings of Saturn. Gee, add a brainbuster and Texas Cloverleaf and you'd have something REALLY scary. Yagi fights forever to reach the ropes, but finally gets them to some good applause. Yoshida picks Yagi up but Yagi hammerlocks her bad arm then suplexes her on it (now that's just RUDE), then clamps on a jujigatame. Yoshida gets her hands together and rolls over, but Yagi separates her hands and rolls her back into position. Yoshida rolls back over, but Yagi rolls her right back, and the crowd gets hotter. Yoshida rolls over again but now Yagi turns it into a wakigatame, and Yoshida lunges at the ropes on all four sides and each time just barely misses them and the crowd is hot hot hot as Yoshida has no choice but to tap out at 13'39". Wrestling? You're soaking in it! ***1/2

- Semi-final match: Michiko Oumaki vs. Candy Okutsu. Okutsu stands on the timekeeper's table before the match to lead the chanting in her name. SHE'S NOT A REAL WRESTLER! Okay, so I stole that joke from CRZ, but hey, I'm the one who's supposed to be the Iron Chef fanatic, remember? Okutsu offers to shake hands before the match, but Oumaki just slaps her hand away. Bell rings, Oumaki ducks an Okutsu clothesline and bounces off the ropes, Okutsu ducks her jumping spinning back kick and comes back off the ropes, Oumaki ducks another clothesline, catches Okutsu and drops her on her head with a T-Bone suplex. Oumaki waits for Okutsu to get up, then when she does she DRILLS her with a jumping spinning back kick, and gets the easy three-count at 0'25". See what you get when you make Bitch Poochie look foolish? After the match Okutsu gets on the stick and says something that elicits applause, and finally gets that handshake she wanted. 1/2* In the locker room interviews after the match, Kong comes in during Okutsu's interview to share a laugh.

- Bonus trios elimination match: Mary Apache, Faby Apache and La Galactica vs. Ayako Hamada, Mika Akino and Ai Fujita. Akino starts for her side as the Mexican trio have all gone to the ring apron. Akino calls at them to come on, so all three enter the ring and walk at her at the same time, and Hamada and Fujita hop off the apron. Akino shoos them off in a cute segment, then as Hamada and Fujita hop back up on the apron, Akino and Hamada push Fujita into the ring, and when the opening bell finally rings it's Mary and Fujita. Collar-and-elbow, Mary goes into a test of strength, pulls Fujita's arms behind her, spins her around, grabs her arm for an arm wringer, snapmares her over and pulls her arms behind her. Fujita shoulder rolls to try to escape, but Mary hangs onto one of her arms, wrings it, takes her over with it, flips back to her feet, wrings it again, goes to a front face lock then wrings the other arm. Fujita cartwheels out of it, then takes Mary down with an armdrag. Fujita adds a neck scissors but Mary flips out of it, drags Fujita to the centre of the ring and locks in a leg scissors. Both women up, Fujita cinches in an arm wringer and takes Mary over with it, then kips up to some applause. Both women tag out and now it's Hamada and Faby. Faby bounces off the ropes, Hamada drops down, Faby cartwheels over her then arm drags Hamada as she gets to her feet. Both women up, Hamada arm drags Faby then floors her with a single leg trip as she gets to her feet, cover, zero. Both women up, Faby single leg trips Hamada, cover, zero. Both women flip up, applause. Both women tag out and now it's Akino and Galactica. Akino catches Galactica charging at her with a dropkick to take her down. Akino whips Galactica cross-corner and charges at her, Galactica back body drops her but Akino lands with her feet on the apron. Akino catches Galactica coming at her by burying a shoulder in her stomach, then comes off the top and arm drags Galactica down. Both women up, Akino tries a rolling bodyscissor pin but no dice, so she goes back to her feet and armdrags Galactica over. Both women up and off the ropes, Akino just plainly tosses Galactica down and cinches in a front face lock into an Irish whip, which she follows up by pushing Galactica down so she almost slides all the way out of the ring, but not quite. Akino drags Galactica back into the ring and tells her partners to get in the ring. Akino whips Galactica into the corner then nails her with a running dropkick. Hamada nails a running dropkick of her own, then Fujita completes the trifecta with a handspring elbow. The Japanese celebrate but the Mexicans come into the ring and a pier six breaks out, with Faby pairing up with Hamada, Mary with Fujita and Galactica with Akino. Triple Irish whip by the Mexicans, triple flapjack attempt is reversed into a triple tuck rana for one, all the Mexicans roll through to reverse the pinfall for a short two. Everyone up, triple Irish whip by the Mexicans, triple tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Everyone up, the Mexicans dropkick the Japanese out of the ring then Mary and Faby meet them out there with topes suicida but Galactica just does a baseball slide dropkick. Mexicans back in the ring, off the opposite side ropes but they just bounce off the near ropes and roll backward and pose, with Galactica needing much longer to do her roll. Finally it's back to Akino and Galactica in the ring, Akino bounces off the ropes and hits a rolling bodyscissor pin on Galactica for a long two. Akino tags in Hamada, who hits a running kick to Galactica's gut, then Irish whips her but now Galactica hits a rolling bodyscissor pin for a short two. Galactica tags in Faby, who kicks Hamada in the gut and then bodyslams her. Mary enters the ring as Faby holds Hamada down, then Mary goes to the second rope, does a little dance and comes off with an elbow into Hamada's chest. Mary covers for a long two. Mary and Faby each take one of Hamada's arm and wrings it then mounts it, taking Hamada to her knees and leaving her exposed for a running dropkick to the head by Galactica. Kaientai Mekushiko? Faby tosses Hamada into her own team's corner, enabling her to tag out to Fujita. Faby catches Fujita coming in with a boot to the gut, then whips her into the corner and clotheslines her. Mary then nails a clothesline of her own, as does Galactica. Galactica brings Fujita out onto the ropes then picks her legs up, and Faby comes off the other side, leapfrogs Galactica and slams into Fujita. Galactica puts Fujita back into position so Mary can do the same thing, then as the five-minute mark is announced Mary picks Fujita up so Galactica can jump on her in the same way as well. Mary takes back over on Fujita with an Irish whip followed up by a spinning heel kick. Galactica just saunters into the ring and Mary goes back to her corner as Galactica picks Fujita up and Irish whips her; Fujita tries to grab Galactica's arm after coming off the ropes, but Fujita just slams her down and covers for a short two. Galactica picks Fujita up and slaps her in the face, then Irish whips her and takes her down with an over-the-shoulder concrete crash for a short two. Fujita goes right back to her corner and tags Akino in, though, and Akino catches Galactica with a running dropkick to the chest. Akino picks Galactica up and Irish whips her, then catches her with a running dropkick to the head. And since the Mexicans played fast and loose with the tags, Hamada comes in without a tag and dropkicks Galactica in the chest, taking her out of the ring. Akino comes back into the ring and she and Hamada look set to both come off at Galactica, but they stop when they see Fujita climbing to the top and decide to knock the Apaches off the ropes as Fujita takes Galactica down with a cross-body block. Fujita then drags Galactica over towards the middle of the aisle so Akino can take her down with a running no-hands somersault plancha. Hamada comes into the ring to take her turn but sees Faby climbing to the top, so she charges at Faby but Faby just slaps her away, then comes off at Akino with a corkscrew plancha. Hamada tries to go out of the ring to get her spot in but now Mary comes into the ring and lays two forearms into her back, then charges at Hamada. Hamada tries to flapjack Mary but Mary lands with her feet on the top rope, and comes off on everyone with a somersault plancha. Finally Hamada has her turn, as she knocks all the pins down with a top-rope Asai moonsault. Once everyone recovers from the trainwreck, Fujita tosses Galactica back in the ring and bodyslams her down, but there's no water in the pool for the moonsault. Galactica with La Majistral for a long two. Galactica feeds Fujita's hands between her own legs then crosses her legs sharpshooter-style, but Hamada enters and dropkicks Galactica in the back. Akino then comes in and dropkicks Galactica in the chest, then runs the Apaches off as Hamada powerbombs Galactica, then Fujita comes off the top with a firebird to make Galactica the first elimination at 8'19". Faby enters the ring straightaway and kicks Fujita in the gut, though, then Irish whips her and attempts a tilt-a-whirl but Fujita counters with a satellite headscissor takeover. Fujita tags out to Hamada, who kicks Faby in the chest then whips her cross-corner, but Faby does a twisting leapfrog in the corner into a sunset flip for a long two. Faby comes off the top turnbuckle with a hard missile dropkick to Hamada's chest for a long two. Faby perches Hamada up on the top turnbuckle but Hamada counters an attempted vertical superplex with three punches to the kidney, then hits a sunset flip powerbomb for an extra-long two. Hamada goes out onto the apron and hits a springboard sunset flip for three to take Faby out at 9'38", leaving Mary alone three-on-one against the Japanese contingent. But Hamada walks straight into a Michinoku Driver and Mary pins Hamada to take her out at 9'49". Fujita storms the ring and hits a tuck rana on Mary for a medium two. Both women off, Fujita comes off the ropes but Mary hits a hard lariat for a long two. Ten minutes gone. Mary picks Fujita up and bodyslams her down, then hits a swanton off the top rope and gets the three-count to eliminate Fujita at 10'20", and it's down to Mary and Akino. Mary celebrates her accomplishments a bit early, though, so Akino wakes her up with a vicious top-rope missile dropkick to the back of her head. Akino scales the ropes and comes off with a quarter-moonsault, but Mary sidesteps it. Mary picks Akino up and plants her with a sit-out powerbomb for an extra-long two. Mary says she's going to go for another Michinoku Driver, but as she goes for it Akino rolls her up for a very long two. Mary picks Akino up and bodyslams her down, then goes to the top but Akino rolls out of the way of the half-gainer moonsault. Akino goes out to the apron and hits a CRISP springboard tuck rana, and that finally takes Mary out to finish the match at 11'32". Galactica kind of ruined the big spots because her timing was a bit off, but otherwise I had no problems with this. **1/2

- Finals: Hiromi Yagi vs. Michiko Oumaki. If I had my druthers I'd rather have Yoshida in there with Oumaki, but hey, they've got to have some singles matches together somewhere, right? Yagi offers another left hand of friendship and Oumaki takes it, and pays for her trouble as Yagi holds on and drives her other forearm into that arm thrice. Oumaki does back her up into a corner, though, and drives a forearm into her chest. Oumaki loads up a stiff kick, but Yagi grabs her foot, throws it over the top rope and then throws out the rest of her as well. Yagi meets her out there with a cross-body block off the top turnbuckle, then picks her up but Oumaki actually ends up being the one to toss her back into the ring. Oumaki follows in and viciously stomps Yagi in the head, then goes up to the second rope only to have Yagi come over and punch her. Yagi goes up to the second rope herself and grabs Oumaki's arm for an arm drag, but Oumaki locks on a sleeper, then rolls off the second rope to take them both off, still holding onto the sleeper. Yagi breaks it by getting to her feet and nailing a jawbreaker, then Yagi goes to the top but Oumaki slaps her in the face. Oumaki goes up to the second rope herself but Yagi flips over her and schoolboys her off for a short two, but Oumaki scissors both her arms behind her back after the pinfall attempt. Yagi gets to the ropes, but Oumaki holds on to one of the arms, and while Yagi ducks one wheel kick she doesn't duck the follow-up, and Oumaki goes straight into a jujigatame. Yagi gets to the ropes in short order, then when she gets to her feet she catches Oumaki coming off the ropes and arm drags her, then locks on a jujigatame of her own. Oumaki turns into it to release the pressure so Yagi releases it, picks Oumaki up and DDTs her for a long two. Yagi tries to go back to the jujigatame but Oumaki has her hands together. Oumaki goes for the ropes but Yagi catches her and breaks her hand-hold, cinching on the jujigatame hard. Oumaki gets to the ropes shortly, so Yagi goes back to the top and catches Oumaki with a missile dropkick. Oumaki springs right back to her feet, though, and catches Yagi getting up with a running high kick. Yagi gets right back up but her clothesline attempt is ducked, and Oumaki hits a backdrop suplex for a long two. Oumaki picks Yagi up and double chicken-wings her, but Yagi drops to her butt to stop the tiger suplex before it can start. By reflex Yagi tenses up in anticipation of the stiff kick to her back, so Oumaki waits for her to tense up then relax, THEN hits the kick. Now that's just uncalled for. Oumaki goes to the top, but Yagi swats away her dive, then hits a rolling scissored legbar. Oumaki fights for the ropes but doesn't reach them for quite some time. Yagi rolls right back up and picks Oumaki up and hits a hammerlock suplex for a long two. Yagi picks Oumaki up but Oumaki wrings her arm, slips behind her and locks on the double chicken-wing, into the tiger suplex with bridge for a long two. Oumaki waits for Yagi to get back to her feet, but Yagi blocks the spinning heel kick, then goes back to the scissored legbar. Oumaki makes it to the ropes a lot quicker this time, then after Yagi picks her up she tries to go for a T-Bone suplex but Yagi grapevines her leg. A back elbow doesn't break the hold for Yagi, but a forward roll back into the scissored legbar does. Oumaki is real close to the ropes, but Yagi pulls her back to the centre of the ring as the five-minute mark is announced. Oumaki finally reaches the ropes after a while, then as she gets up she catches Yagi charging at her by kicking her in the stomach, then follows that up with an attempted splash mountain but Yagi rolls behind her and hits a sunset flip for one, and back to the scissored legbar. Oumaki is near the ropes, though, so she grabs them. Yagi drops a leg on Oumaki's leg, then tries to pick her up but Oumaki gets her knee up in her face. Oumaki then hits an ax kick to Yagi's shoulder for a long two. Oumaki picks Yagi up and hits a tiger driver for a long two, but after the pin is broken Yagi scissors Oumaki's arm from behind. Oumaki turns into it, gets on top of Yagi and lifts her up by the head, but when she drops Yagi back down Yagi won't give up the hold. Oumaki gets her hands together to stop the pain, though, and finally reaches the ropes. Yagi picks Oumaki up and hits a rolling jujigatame takeover, but Oumaki rolls into it, so Yagi goes to a double wristlock. Oumaki again keeps her hands together, though, and manages to reach the ropes. Both women up, Yagi bounces off the ropes but Oumaki catches her with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex, then as Yagi's down Oumaki viciously kicks her in the head, then shoulder, then chest. Oumaki picks Yagi up and goes for the T-Bone Suplex but Yagi won't go over and she elbows out of the hold. Yagi bounces off the ropes but Oumaki ducks her clothesline, grabs her and finally hits the T-Bone. Oumaki picks Yagi up and hits ANOTHER T-Bone for a very long two count. Ten minutes gone as Oumaki picks Yagi up and hits a PERFECT delayed space mountain for the three-count and the tournament at 10'27". **3/4

- Oumaki celebrates like mad, even going so far as to throw herself into the referee's arms, and collects her certificate, big-ass trophy and other goodies in the post-match ceremony. There's also some stuff involving a woman from the crowd holding a blue stuffed cat, but you'll have to wait until I learn Japanese before I can hope to tell you what that's all about.

The Bottom Line: Since I haven't seen much Arsion yet I can't rate this against other events, but on its own this tape rocks and is definitely worth a look, especially for those of you who like more, you know, WRESTLING in your wrestling. Not that there's anything wrong with being a Sports Entertainment fan; I'm one myself. They're two different worlds, and neither is empirically better than the other; it's just a matter of personal taste, no matter what anyone calling himself a "playboy" or "cru member" may say.

Anyway, the best part is that the tape doesn't stop there, so my next Arison recap (not necessarily my next puro recap) will cover the second event on the tape, the 1999 Sky Tournament, and I'll get to introduce you all to my latest crush. Yeah, there's no hope for me. Deal with it, I do.

Recommended on its own, highly recommended if you get it on the tape with the '99 Sky Tournament from prowrestlingtapes.com.